If Only I Could Do That!

There are lots of things that people complain about, when getting older. I have always tried to exercise and look after my body as much as I have abused it, which, to be quite honest, has never been easy.  My body has had more abuse than a blind cobbler’s thumb! They say your body is a temple, but I have never been very religious so mine has never been worshipped much.

I have, in the past, smoked too much, drunk too much; I have also been a kick boxer, and also I have a penchant for cooked breakfasts. All these together make me a happy chappy, but don‘t make for a healthy body.

But to balance all this up, I work out and watch what I eat, with the exception of the cooked breakfasts. I eat fresh cooked food, and no longer drink too much or smoke at all, so for my advancing years,  I think I’m quite fit.

So getting older doesn’t bother me that much, as I can still do all the things I did when I was a lot younger. Except for one thing, a thing you might find disgusting. Something I used to be able to put in my mouth, but now I can no longer do it, and I do miss it, (no not that!) I used to be able to bite my own toenails.

I know it sounds gross, but I liked to watch TV while having a chomp on my toenails. My ability to do this didn’t stop when I was just a sprog, it only stopped a few years ago, and it stopped very abruptly. One day I could sit happily with a mouthful of toe, the next I was about as supple as a stick with arthritis. Why this should happen is beyond me, I haven’t put my hip out or broken any bones! My leg just refused to offer up my foot any more. Perhaps it had developed  manners.

Other than the lack of toe action, I honestly don’t feel any different now to how I did twenty years ago. I know I’m a bit slower, but I still spar and play Badminton sometimes for up to two hours at a time. I travel quite a lot and can set off at two in the morning and arrive back home at eight at night on the same day without a problem.

A friends of mine said, “You’ll just drop down dead with a heart attack one day, you smug bastard!” But I hope that I do - that’s the way to go.

Talking of travel, I really want to visit Australia to work. This sounds strange but you get to see the real country when you work there. You get to know the people, and get to see the good and the bad, rather than a tourist fantasy.

Out of all the countries that I have visited so far, Germany is the one that surprised me the most. I didn’t expect to like it as much as I did! Like all countries it has its problems, but the Germans know how to work hard and they know how to play hard, it’s my kind of place.

Australians seem to have the same qualities, plus the country looks like one hell of a place to visit. So if there’s any Australian school teachers or librarians reading this that want to book me, what are you waiting for..? I have tried this a few times but, as yet,  not a sausage!

Like Germany, I bet there are loads of other countries in Europe that we Brits don’t think of as holiday destinations, but would be a good place to visit. As I have already mentioned I’m lucky enough to travel with my work so I go to places we wouldn’t visit otherwise. Like Luxembourg, I think it’s a country people drive through to get to somewhere else. To be honest it’s better to leave it like that, there’s nothing there to be seen that wouldn’t take you more than an hour!

But what about some of the eastern European countries? We all have an image of cold barren places (well I do) but having seen the football I was surprised just how interesting some of the cities looked. But Burnham-on-Sea looks like a nice resort whenever I’ve seen it on the TV. If the world has an armpit it’s modelled on Burnham!

Travel, even if it’s just around your own country, broadens the mind and opens you up to new ideas. For me it keeps me going and keeps me thinking and feeling young, but I still can’t  chomp on my own bloody toenails anymore!