Twisted Eggs!

Firstly, can I just say, “We were robbed, guv”?

If you have read recent blogs of mine, you may be aware that I have tried to start an artistic movement called ‘Twisted Minds‘.

It’s a not-for-profit, non-political or religious movement, that exists only to promote and help artists of all genres.

My son and his partner are staying with us over the weekend, and last night they watched ‘Britain Needs Talent’, the show that is the very reason that `Twisted Minds' was formed.

I decided to ignore the bland-fest and teach my beautiful little grand daughter, Harleigh the art of irritating adults. But to my surprise, while Harleigh and I were trying to find the perfect pitch of a scream, an act appeared on the bland-fest which was quite breathtaking.

This act was so beautifully choreographed and moving that I was sure that it would win the show!

Can you imagine my surprise and horror on finding that the show didn’t even give this obviously intelligent and talented person a chance to finish her act? Not only did they cut her off in full flow, but then we, the public, were denied the chance to vote for her!

This is a blatant attempt by Cowell to rig the voting in favour of one of his puppet acts!

So please, I urge you to twitter, e mail and facebook your campaign to get the egg woman the vote!

The way she threw the eggs at her target, the way they hit the target without any other collateral damage, was a thing of beauty.

We at Twisted Minds DO NOT CONDONE VIOLENCE in any shape or form, but we do like a protest!

This woman is obviously a ‘Twistee’ a member of the free thinking; if she hasn’t joined us yet, please if you know her, urge her to become one of the free.

Speaking about free thinking and free speech, has anyone else noticed that people seem to be less and less bothered about privacy?

They give out phone numbers, e mail addresses, and contact details without any thought about who they are giving them to. They also share their innermost thoughts and fears on social networking sites for the world to see.

I know I’m writing a blog and doing the very same thing, but I only share certain thoughts with you all. And my medical records and sex life are not for human consumption!

While waiting for The Nemesis (my wife, Carol) to buy yet more clothes she neither wants or needs the other day, I found myself sitting next to a young girl who was engrossed in her phone call.

It has to be said that from the way she spoke and acted I don’t think she was an Oxford graduate! The phrases, ’Shut up!’ and, ’Are you joking?’ were used liberally.

At first, I thought that she was on the phone to her friend, but when she started to discuss a lump on her breast that she had found I changed my assumption and thought it might be a medical type being bombarded with her rapier-like wit.

“So what will it look like then?” was her first in-depth question.

She then said, ‘OK’ put her phone down and removed one of her ample breasts from her under-sized bra!

I became terribly British for about ten seconds and looked away pretending that this wasn’t happening. But then the ten year old inside me took over and I turned and watched in amusement.

She then proceeded to examine her mammoth mammary. Then she whacked it back into the frail garment that was designed for something ten pounds lighter and snapped back into the phone, “Nar it’ll be ok. Are you going to the pub tonight?”

Bang went the medical-type theory! All this took place in Wakefield city centre, outside the cathedral, where people walked about their business, her intimate fears shared with all without a glimmer of embarrassment!

Is it just me, or is this not just a little unusual?