Bullies!

I watched with some amusement when Obama announced that if we were not all good boys and girls and didn't play ball with his buddy, Dave-the-Suit, we would all be cut out of his future trade deals. This was in no way rigged between Cameron and Obama to get the great unwashed not to leave the EU, it was a true fact! But when questioned further in a later interview, he quickly retracted what he had said by saying they were doing a single deal with the EU at the moment and we would have to talk with America at a later date.

But then you get Boris-the-Bully Johnson reacting with more nonsense.  The whole referendum is being run as a negative campaign of fear: you are not supposed to make an informed choice, you are supposed to be scared witless about choice and change. In all reality no one really knows if Britain will be better off staying or going - it's all “what ifs”!

We now seem to have developed politicians who run campaigns by bullying the public; they have turned into abusive partners.

“If you leave, you'll have nothing!”
“I'm doing this just for you!”
“I hate to see you suffer, but it's not my fault!”
“You will thank me in the future. It's tough love”.

Ask any person who has been abused by their partners how many times they have heard these statements in one form or another.

The Tories have to cut benefits, the police, the NHS (not the banks, though) because of Labour’s previous time in government. They hate doing all these things but they are doing it because they care so much about the country. Don't give up now, together we can be stronger if we all just stick together. The abusive partner beats up on their victim then tells them, it was the drink that made them do it. It's because they love them so much that they behave this way. They really want to change things but they know it will take time. Don't throw everything away over this one thing! These are all just the same tactics: make you feel weak and unsure, while promising change if you just keep things as they are.

Bullies need your submission, your compliance.  It is the basis of their hold over you. The famous quote from Wellington when told he was about to be exposed in the press, “Publish and be damned!” is wonderful. This one sentence sums up how is best to deal with these situations.

We are told lots of different things about how to deal with bullies at school.  Usually it's “tell the teacher”, while in the workplace it's “tell the boss”.  But what if it's the boss who's the bully? Of course each bullying situation is different and we now even have cyber bullying. But for me the best thing to do is face the bully/ies. I know this is hard, I know there is a chance you may encounter violence, but just ask them why, and what their problem is? Stand your ground. I'm not advocating violence, I'm saying take back the power. I know this is easier said than done. I have written in my blogs before that I haven't ever been bullied. I'm too big and aggressive to bully physically and too stupid to bully mentally. If people try to ridicule me for no reason other than malice, then I'm more than capable of retaliation, I write comedy for a living!

But what about the bullies? Cameron wants us to stay in Europe for his own political means, he doesn't want us leaving on his watch. Same for Johnson: he wants to seize power and this he can do if we leave. They are both doing it for their own means.

I think Obama probably does think that a united Europe is a better and stronger ally for the USA. But again, he spoke out for what was in his best interest.

Lots of bullies don't realise that they are bullying others. Some really do think that they are just having a laugh. I'm not talking about the evil-minded halfwits who menace and intimidate, I'm talking about the playground and workplace bullies who mock and belittle. I'm not trying to condone their actions, but when these people are accused of being bullies, a lot of them are genuinely shocked and even, in some cases, quite upset!

Whatever form of bullying you may be suffering from, I wish you well in dealing with what can be a complex situation. Don't let the bully take away your defiance, as, without it, you will only become weaker and suffer more. Talk about the situation you have found yourself in to others; even talk to the bully, asking them to justify their actions.

But when it comes to political bullying, don't listen to negative spin from any side. Read up on matters that concern you, do not read the press, look elsewhere. Make an informed rational choice on what you think is fair and best, taking your own circumstances into consideration, and tell all the negative bullies to GO TO HELL!